"I WANT TO SEE YOU", "YOU ARE VERY OBEDIENT", "ALL VERY NICE, BUT YOU, DON'T YOU HAVE ANYTHING TO SAY? I WANT TO SEE YOU"To explain the meaning of these phrases, I should tell you a story...
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For many years, Tango occupied a secondary place in my life, a place of escape. I had never formally studied. I went there, to the milonga, to close my eyes and let myself go. It was my moment of rest. My dance expression was developed in other dances so that need was extinguished in other circumstances.
Everything changed when I left Argentina. The expert was no longer available. That elderly man who knew how to hug me, who knew how to lead me delicately, who knew what I wanted and gave it to me generously, was no longer available. That wisdom of someone who has danced the Tango all his life, who was so easy to find in my city ones, here it was not only scarce, it did not exist at all. So, my moment of avoidance quickly became my moment of frustration. So it didn't take me long to abandon it, almost completely. Some years later, I saw an advertisement for an Argentine teacher and I thought: |
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WHAT IF I TAKE MY FIRST TANGO lesson?That was the beginning of a new journey. A different trip with Tango. An endless journey of self-discovery. The first thing I discovered about myself was my fear of not being enough, of being judged by whoever is looking and by the man with whom I am dancing: that the woman owes this and the woman owes that. It involved a lot of pressure. I no longer gave myself up to enjoyment. Now I was wondering if I was a good follower. And all the time I danced, afraid of screwing up. |
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The next that became clear was the frustration of not being in control of my destiny. I mean, depending on a man who danced well in order to enjoy myself. Of suffering in some way the dance, instead of being an active creator. Whether positive or negative, the experience was not up to me. I found myself staring desperately at the most skilled man. And that made me feel insecure and needed. Me, who always considered me an independent woman. The third thing that manifested itself was a desire for recognition. I listened to the conversations and always had the feeling that this recognition went only to men, as if nothing depended on the woman. It was he who built the dance, and then it was fair to recognize in him the success of a performance. To her, there were complimented by banal things, like her beauty and elegance. While the recognition of "creator", or "artist" always went every time and exclusively for him. So... |
I took matters into my own handsAnd that gave me back the reins of my expression.
I began to study the leader role very seriously. A short time later, I was an excellent leader. I enjoyed it very much. I began to attend the milonga wearing men's pants and men's shoes. I no longer even had an interest in dancing in the female role. When I used to arrive at the milonga I felt the gazes of the other women on me. They were looks of desire. Sign that my dance was liked. It didn't take long for me to get vain as those men who have prowess in dancing. Something, however, did not quite fit. Although I really enjoyed dancing with other women, my desire for expression was fading, I had obtained that look of respect that I wanted from both men and women, the point is that hugging a man has a different taste. I had acquired the experience of being on the other side of the embrace, which gave me security. I was no longer afraid of being a bad follower. On the contrary, I had become a great collaborator. I solved problems, and I was attentive to the dance floor, to the music, but even so... When I have to do with a slightly violent man, or with little experience, I felt frustrated again. |
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THEN I MET HIM, MY GURURodolfo Dinzel. Cacho, my beloved Cacho. And I received the biggest lesson that anyone had given me up until then. "You dance very beautifully, but you are very much at the service of the man. I want to see you". Phrase that he repeated to me several times, “I want to see you”, “I want to see you”... “I want to see you”. Added to others like “You are very obedient”, "Everything is very nice, but you, don't you have anything to say? I want to see you." At the time, I had no idea how to do it, but I also wanted him to see me. The penny dropped, after a few years of study. Studying the Dinzel System in depth. Understanding how the woman can propose, she can even literally lead. The first time I saw Gloria show how it was done, my jaw dropped. Since then, I repeat the scene to my students whenever the occasion arises. Finding my own spaces to express myself freely, without losing the connection with my partner, went from desire to reality. |
THE CONFIRMATION THAT THINGS WERE IN THEIR PLACE, I HAD by DANCING IN THE Salón CANNING WITH A GENTLEMAN OF ABOUT 80 YEARS
When we finish the first tango, he tells me: "Waw, how nice! It's like dancing with my wife again. The girls these days are waiting for me to do everything, and I get tired. I'm old, you see."
Very occasionally I keep running into some obtuse person who stops the dance to ask me: are you or am I leading? Until very recently, it infuriated me. But I don't think I'm going to react like that anymore, I'll say thank you and retire. I no longer want to waste time and energy with those who do not want to understand. (Besides, the obtuse are usually lousy dancers.)
Very occasionally I keep running into some obtuse person who stops the dance to ask me: are you or am I leading? Until very recently, it infuriated me. But I don't think I'm going to react like that anymore, I'll say thank you and retire. I no longer want to waste time and energy with those who do not want to understand. (Besides, the obtuse are usually lousy dancers.)
MY COMMITMENT IS TO SHARE MY EXPERIENCE WITH YOUI focus my energy to help you and make the path easier for you, who are in search of a Tango where you feel free. Where the conversation between the couple is real. It has no longer anything to do with one role or the other. We are both responsible for exercising our own freedom. This implies taking charge, respect to and respect to yourself, listen to, and listen to yourself. Being free doesn't mean doing whatever you want. Being free means being able to choose consciously and having the skills to be yourself in every circumstance, respecting the environment. |
YOU ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR YOUR ENJOYMENTThe only thing you have the power to change is yourself. You can put the focus on everything external that does not allow you to enjoy and spend your life complaining. Or you can matters into your own hands and learn what you need to transform yourself. |
SOME SUBSTANTIAL THINGS ABOUT MEPurpose: I believe that learning to dance tango triggers a process of self-knowledge and personal development capable of favoring the development of a society where men and women share, exercising their responsible freedom, from parity, complicity and reciprocal support.
Vision: Inspire as many people as possible to be present in the here and now. Being in the first person and generating a community that is a refuge, containment and protection, to be able to manifest love and escape the fear that prevents us from fulfilling our purpose in this life. Mission: I use the complete experience of dancing tango, which involves infinite learning, daily practice and the community that contains it, to generate a process where I show you all the wisdom that is in your body and in the body of the other, so that you use it in your favor. And from there you can little by little implement a more humane, loving and conscious way of living in your daily life. Values: LOVE To love is to let appear. Allow me to appear and let you appear. How could we dance tango without loving each other? To dance we have to recognize ourselves respectfully, honestly and lovingly. Allow us to choose responsibly and autonomously. Dance and live together in reflection, conversation and collaboration. GRATITUDE Gratitude is energy. A force that motivates us to give the best of ourselves, because it recognizes all the good that is in our lives. An energy that heals the fears that prevent us from living fully. To be grateful for the meeting, for the hug, for the Tango. For learning, for pleasure, for the discovery of dancing Tango. ENTHUSIASM Being enthusiastic about the dance of life, with its experiences, learning and difficulties to overcome as an essential engine to face the challenge of change that we want to achieve. |
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AND OTHER LESS...I am Argentine, but I have been living in Venice for 20 years.
My dream to be a dancer, an educator by vocation. A trade I studied at university, but actually learned from my mother. She belongs to that class of school teachers who remain in the memory. When I evaluate my professional experience in this field, I consider that the most significant achievement is having been invited to teach at my master's studio in Buenos Aires. I also like to be in the role of student, and I put myself there whenever I can. It makes me happy to think that I am an expert in hugging, or as my brother-in-law once called me: a "professional hugger." Giving and receiving hugs is undoubtedly what gives me the most joy in this world, and I am convinced that they have the power to heal. With Venice, it was love at first sight, its beauty continues to fascinate me, especially at sunset. How I Ended Here is a story that includes a fall into a canal, a bathtub filled with rose petals, and a Venetian curse. But I'll tell you this story with a mate or a spritz in between. It's ok for you? |
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